Yeah yeah… i know that it is probably firefox’s spell checker that is causing the problem.. but it’s still funny.

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This weekend I am visiting my parents at their home, and I stumbled upon the set of weights someone gave me when I was very young. This was a hand-me-down weight set which is probably originally from the 70s. With the weights I found a poster with a workout guide. Here are the first 4 exercises. Which are 100% guaranteed to make you hurtyourself:

(Click for larger image)

1. Caveman swing
2. I’m a little tea pot… with weights
3. Circle jerk
4. Cheerleader press

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You’ve got it. If you want to look cool at a bar you have to pop your collar. I hope this old dude got laid.

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Last week, my buddies and I went to this trashy local bar. The bar is pretty gross, the men’s restroom used to have a toilet, but they took it out and put a table over it and the last time I went there there was already vomit in the sink at 10pm. If you’re wondering, we went because it was the only bar that didn’t have a line - it was the last day of exams.

Every time i’ve been there in the last year or two they have the same DJ. He’s awful and this time I had had enough so I took a video to put on the internet. The video didn’t turn out that well but it’s ok because you can hear everything clearly and that’s enough.

Now to anyone out there who thinks it is good I only have one thing to say: If people liked to hear you scream then you would have a multi-million dollar recording contract. We’ve all heard famous lines in hip hop songs like “wave your hands up in the air” (or something). But have you ever heard “scream like you’re constipated” or “throw a tantrum over my song” ?

So to all you aspiring DJ’s out there, do us all a favor: shut the fuck up and play the music. Leave the music making to people that have talent.

Popularity: 27% [?]

Popularity: 27% [?]

Click on the picture to see the full size.

Well it turns out that a pen and paper aren’t useless after all. I used to criticize one of my old friends all the time for carrying around a pen in his pocket. But maybe he had it right all along. Who knows. This is a note we were using at a bar. Three of us used it. I crashed and burned hard. I ended up telling a girl i knew kung-fu and I would beat up her boyfriend. My girlfriend got a girl’s phone number and kissed her (pretty hot). And of course the grabstar was successful. I tried to get videos of it all. The only one that turned out was grabstar’s. But he doesn’t wan’t me to post it. He doesn’t want his shitbaggery on display.

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He chops them up.. then he eats them…..

then he stores their remains in his closet!

I was at my buddies place and we looked in the closet it. And this is what we found! The sad part is that his girlfriend is moving in with him this friday. I wish I had a camera to capture the look on her face when she sees that.

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You never know when it’s coming.

PS somebody doesn’t want to be identified on my site anymore

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I met this girl at the bar a little while ago. She broke her collar bone and had a plate put in. Then after like a year or so something popped.

Click to see a _BIG_ version (it’s really big)

Click to see a _BIG_ version (it’s really big too)

She let me touch it. It was a bad idea.

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